Sutton’s Telegraph Improved Cucumber

I had a pleasing rehearsal last night, about specificity. It was very refreshing to focus on adding details to the environment and characters. In one scene I discovered Michael’s character had a cleaning badge by choosing to polish it, in another I discovered my mob boss had killed an unfaithful lieutenant specifically by punching his brains in. Then I punched Michael’s brains in.

Afterwards I had a great reminder of how specificity tickles me as I was reading a seed catalogue in the toilet. There is a cucumber known as Sutton’s Improved Telegraph. That is magnificent and immediately hilarious to me. Even the fact I discovered it in a seed catalogue in the loo is strangely compelling and amusing. These things exist all around us and are delightful to stumble across whilst reading on the loo or on stage improvising.

Fellow improvisers, I ask you: what kind of cucumbers do you grow? It has to be Sutton’s Improved Telegraph for me.


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